I see RED, and I can’t see at all

Patterns of thought;

I feel loved and unaccepted

tolerated and rejected.

I see red, and can’t see at all.

My verse is short

My fuse is fragile

I see red, and can’t see at all.

Patterns………

where they lead me.

Solutions of Insanity

Pathways to Serenity

I see red, and can’t see at all.

Spying escape from myself

I tear away my mask.

I see red, and I can’t see at all.

My Fans shred away my inhibition.

I walk in submission

Head Held High

eyes turned down

TAKING OFF MY CROWN

Photo-0322

The torture of silence brews in fear of not being acknowledged.

Oad to the world

I AM ALREADY DEAD!

Oad to the world

my time spent plundering

a treasure never mine……

Oad to you.

It is getting quite cold in here

death is

cold……dark, the darkest kind of cold; rooted to

DESIRE…..’desire for life’

sex

friendships

IMMORTALITY 

LOVE

Dreams of a (PIL) Perfect Imagined Live

gains courage

…….TO DESTROY

I am on this journey knowing one thing only….(that I don’t know MUCH)

That I get stuck

I get  mugged

I desire blood.

ONE THING CERTAIN…..

…..

Much time spent

playing ignorant!

My uncontrollable plight

I beg for the night

I wake with horrid fright

I tremble at the sight of my moment to moment strife

Guided by a force unknown

I look to the tools the Universe has shown

My past and future are my present

Like a Christmas in November……

except it is October.

My red turns to bright pinks and purples

I have NO PEARL

I am but MAN

Seeking to understand……

HOw to let go .And let God

Amen

Anyone whom admits defeat is a friend of mine. I am powerless over people, places and things today!

Cheers!

Happy Friday as well!!!

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Saturday ‘Squezze Me’

Looking for activities which connect me with my true nature.

Health and Happiness result from being in harmony with our own nature, and doing the work for which we are individually suited.

Dr. Bach’s Philosophy

Scleranthus is an insecurity flower,

communicating to me

Hopefully I see….BUT if not

the compensation flower use, is key.

To Me,

this place would be

reliable;

in calming my mind.

Soothing my anxiety.

Fulfilled?……

Satisfied?…..

with what the moment IS ‘presently’

War wages down, all round.

Consciencely, looking to keep my relationships sound.

“Wishing us a prosperous day”

Many times I will say, “May you be prosperous in your day…..”

Keep on doing it…..

lets BE

doers’

‘shakers’

(pause)…………

……………………..

……….AND MOVERS

My three page free verse is half full.

Sending myself to school.

Rebecca once shared, “Write your way to happiness.”

Embrace despair,

grow out my hair!?

Another encouraging voice,

a whispering choice.

(speaks possibility), “Everything imagined is Your perfect imagined reality”

“Everything written plants a seed of prosperity”

I will chant my way to prosperity.

I open my mind to possibility.

Hold on to Joy

Be OK with Me

Turn away from tragedy,

BE FREE

BE FREE ; Creatively;

healthy sexuality;

abandon negativity; Do Not Toy with Me !

I am nearly there

Rushing through my anxiety;

using

‘lemon balm tea’,

apple cider vinegar ‘tottie’

with a bit of ‘honey’

PeAcE

 

Slick and Cool

Some days of mania keep me from schedule/goal

Giving myself the freedom/permission to go with it

Steady going all day, getting back on my feet

Off to make an apron for my girlfriends wedding gift….TOMORROW 🙂

More on mania?

We all like it when life feels good 🙂  And for it to end would mean something less (When I feel depressed life doesn’t seem worth living…BUT THAT’S RUBISH RIGHT NOW!)  

WHY?

I’m going to ride it/ follow my ambitions for creativity.

Wishing everyone a splendid weekend!!  May we be joyous and free

Come Play with Me

Peace be with You, courage becoming your own positive emotional provider.  Truth is, I am in control of that at-LEAST-in control of the thoughts I choose to follow.  I can create thought and reveal a kinder Me!

Hope you enjoy my attempted in coherently expressing my insight.  I realize my biggest problem, WANTING TO CONTROL MY ENVIRONMENT (people, climate; to name a few).  In this poem I am seeing myself as the Dictator I prove to be…..at times attempting to console this character, I use coping skills (hence, Tool Bag) Breathing, Distraction, Thought Awareness are some of the things I tried thus far!

I am on my way to accepting completely.  This day is really just a dream.  But in this dream I am the conscious observer. Thanks for indulging me.  

Raging war

keeping score.

Dictating with intention

never in the kitchen.

Character bleeds for attention

justifies her ambition.

Seeking consoling from aggression

my current plight KNOWS NOT submission.

Tool Bag of my prized possessions

abstract/physical means of relaxation

Knee pads for the humble

Paintbrush for the speaker

Silence for the wise

I just attended an AA meeting, accompanied a fellow addict. (Something I recently put back into my Tool Bag !!)

I pulled, out of my Tool Bag; a deep breath and deeper exhale.  The continued moments since have been similarly resisted.  My mind is indestructible.  This character is looking for something-something STRONGER (new belief about a thought/memory.  I am off to Mindfulness Co-Ed Group.